I know you have heard the words ‘ self-love’ a lot lately and you might be wondering exactly what that means. Self-love means an array of things that can start by simply taking care of our bodies and getting more sleep. It also can entail removing toxic people from our lives and positive thinking. It can be about connecting with spirit and figuring out our path. One thing is for certain…it is all of the above and so much more. So much more that it is actually a journey, a commitment to oneself. It is also one that is not easy to start for a lot of people, but once you do, you never want to stop.
It starts with a simple question…Do you value who you are? It’s a tough question because most people do not value who they are and this is when they make wrong choices. Granted we are all born into different circumstances, but even so, we all have the power to choose ourselves. This is where valuing yourself comes into play. When we value our self-worth we make good choices, and when we don’t value our self-worth…well, that is where all the bad choices come into play. I do not know about you, but Lord knows I have made many bad choices in my life. So many, I try not to think about them. But all those bad choices came about because I let my circumstances define me. I did not recognize my value. We get so busy comparing ourselves to other people that we fail to recognize the value in ourselves. Because the truth is, the only person that has to value what you do, is you. And this is why self-love is not something you can do in a day, a week, a month, or a year. It is a life long journey of discovering the great value of who you are.
STOP LOOKING OUTSIDE FOR HAPPINESS
There was a time when looking for happiness within yourself came easier. This was before the internet and social media came into play. When life was a lot simpler. Fast forward to today and it can seem as if one’s life is lacking if we try to compare to all the beautiful pictures we see on social media. We get mixed up in the judging and comparing and forgetting that we are all flawed. We are all perfectly imperfect, otherwise how boring would life be if we were all the same. We get so focused on the end results that we do not take into consideration the journey it took people to get there.
But what would it be like if we stopped looking outside for happiness because it is just temporary since happiness comes from within. Just like the excitement is soon over when you buy a new car or a new dress because all physical items bring us joy, but they are always feelings that go away because material things are temporary. Once we understand that, we realize that our true value does not have anything to do with the outside world and everything to do with us. The whole us. Because the body, mind, and soul work in beautiful harmony when they are perfectly balanced. When we place the weight of our happiness, not on a scale, but instead on how we feel we create perfection.
How you feel about yourself when you look in the mirror says a lot. So many of us are at war with our bodies and too busy beating ourselves up. I know I’ve been guilty of it. What we fail to remember is that our body is not our enemy, but our friend, so we should treat it like one. It’s a loving beautiful piece of art that was created, not just to carry your soul, but to give life. Women are blessed because we have the ability to carry a tiny human in us, and we are overjoyed during pregnancy, but once we have our child we tear our bodies down because of what it’s been through. Instead, we should be proud of every stretch mark, our waist size never being the same, and not worrying where our abs went to because once you give life your own life will never be the same. Why on earth would you expect your body to be? I’m not saying don’t take care of yourself, I’m saying don’t tear yourself down in the process. You are a superhero, a warrior, and a mother. Love your body for all its miracles and treat it like a friend.
WHERE DO I COMPROMISE ON SELF LOVE?
As women, we compromise a lot. As mothers, we comprise so much of who we are, that we easily lose ourselves. We put everyone’s needs before our own, we procrastinate, forget to take care of our bodies, we forget our voice, we overextend ourselves, and accept less than we deserve. So how do you find yourself again? You make time to explore who you are, what you like, what you do not like, what makes you smile, makes you cry, what your favorite foods are, what it feels like to dive into a book and lose yourself in the story, to be one with nature, to meet new people or encounter new places, to look in the mirror and see yourself as a perfect soul instead of a body, to connect, and to show gratitude each and every day.
If you find it hard to start the process on your own, take a look at my 21 Day Self Love Challenge. You will discover so much about yourself in the 21 days and it is super easy to do. You only need 5-10 minutes a day except on the last day which takes a lot longer but so worth it! It’s my favorite day of all of them. Just keep in mind that the challenge was written in a particular order so please do not switch or skip days. Give it a try and I would love to know what you think in the comments.
I can tell you when you decide to choose yourself you will never want to go back. When you recognize your value, you will notice a change in how you speak and treat what you say with value. You will discover yourself all over again and will start to choose yourself each and every day. It is a beautiful thing and you so deserve it. Decide today to choose happiness. Choose you!